Guess what?

Remember how Milo had The Diaper Rash That Would Not Go Away? Well! Turns out he had (has?) an MRSA infection!

That's terrible!

Yes. Well. I suppose I feel like somewhat better of a parent for not being able to fix it. I felt such guilt over The Rash, like maybe we just need to switch soaps or lotions AGAIN or try a new detergent AGAIN or give him more probiotics or try yet another rash cream or ointment or put him on another antibiotic for a yeast infection he didn't have (WHICH IS THE EXACT SORT OF BEHAVIOR THAT LEADS TO MRSA IN THE FIRST PLACE).

But still. How many months did he have this infection without it ever being discovered? My guess is close to six. How much damage could it have done in that time? Plenty. How many other kids at the daycare have it (because yes, I am 99.9 percent certain that he contracted it at daycare)? Who knows?

There's really no telling if Milo still has it. His diaper rash is sometimes better, sometimes worse. But since we haven't done anything to treat MRSA, I'd guess it's still present. Poor kid.

The Latest Hallmark Recordable Storybook

Here's the most recent Recordable Storybook I edited. This one jumped straight to #2 out of all our books (only behind our Disney Cars Recordable Storybook, which has the support of the movie to give it an extra boost), and I predict it'll do well for a long time. Go check it out. Perfect for all the little princesses in your life!

Image from Hallmark.com

More new words

Milo is learning new words faster than I can get them noted. He knows "car" and "good job." We tell him "good job" a lot, and he always claps for himself when we say it. Now he repeats it, then claps. Adorable.

15 Months!

• Weight: 25 lbs., 13 oz. (75th percentile)
• Length: 30 1/2 in. (30th percentile)
• Head Circumference: 19 in. (75th percentile)

Milo is doing so much and impressing me daily. I can't believe how quickly he learns things.

I taught him how to shake hands. It's adorable. He doesn't know to just use his right hand, so we shake with both. But seriously, can anyone tell me why we only shake hands one way?

He is constantly learning new words, and he's especially fond of "B" words. His words: ball, balloon, bird, byebye, hi, hello (like answering the phone), whoa, banana, kitty, bubble, fan, more (which he pronounces "mama").

He is just the sweetest boy ever. Yesterday I held out my arms and said, "Milo, can I have a hug?" and he smiled real big, came over to me and basically climbed into my arms. He snuggled for a moment, then went back to playing. And my heart melted all over the floor.

Milo loves swinging.

Milo likes playing at the park, and he can even go down the slide all by himself.

One of Milo's favorite activities is pushing things around. Laundry baskets, trashcans, toy bins—if he can move it, he pushes it.

He is starting to get more hair, especially in the back. It's looking pretty blond, except in the sun, when it definitely has a hint of red.

Milo has five teeth now. His 5th (top, just left of center) poked through a couple days ago.

When we say "Good job," Milo claps.

Milo's favorite book is "The Bugliest Bug." We've been reading it a lot. Andrew has it memorized. He sometimes brings over a book and expects to be read to, but his interest doesn't last long.

Favorite foods include eggs, cheese, bread, bananas, grapes, and strawberries. When he sees a banana being peeled, he literally flaps his arms with excitement.

Milo is an excellent night-sleeper, going down (easily) around 7:45 and sleeping until about 6:00.  He occasionally wakes up too early, but since he rarely fusses in the night, it seems like an okay trade-off. Says me, who gets to sleep in every Sunday thanks to my amazing husband.

Milo is now 15 months old, which is the age my sister was when I was born. What? I've always known this, but now that I have a baby that old, it's even more unbelievable. So close together.

Milo cries when Andrew leaves him at daycare. Or pretty much when Andrew leaves him anywhere. He's a major Daddy's boy.

Milo likes to chase and be chased in circles around the house.

When Andrew says, "Where's Milo?" Milo covers his eyes with both hands. Then the requisite "There he is!" upon the eye reveal. Milo finds this hilarious.

During bathtime, Milo will put his face in the water sometimes. He thinks this is pretty fun.

He likes putting things in other things and taking them back out again (like toys in a basket).

He'll pick up pretty much anything and hold it up to his ear like a phone and say "hello" (pronounced more like "eh-oh") in the same intonation one would use when answering the phone. Don't know where he learned this trick, as we hardly ever talk on the phone.

Milo takes one nap during the day at daycare, and two naps on weekend days. Sigh. Wish he could get more sleep at daycare.

I love love love Milo. Sometimes I look at him and still can't believe he's mine. Lucky, lucky me.

The sprinkler, Chicago, and a really big T-shirt

I know I haven't posted photos in awhile, so I wanted to reassure you that Milo is indeed still quite cute. This post is just a bunch of photos from that last month or so.

First, the really big T-shirt. Actually, on me, this is a really tiny T-shirt.

Over Memorial Day weekend, we had a little barbecue at my parents' house. Milo enjoyed riding around in the Cozy Coupe and playing in the sprinkler.

We also recently took a trip to Chicago to visit our good friends. Milo and Eli are really close in age, and it was great fun to hang out with two adorable tiny people. We even put them in matching outfits, because how else could we embarrass them when they're in middle school?

I just love Milo's expression in this one.

He climbed the stairs and went down the slide all by himself!

Hello Again

Well. It has been awhile, hasn't it? I owe you some updates.

• Andrew taught Milo how to "raise the roof." It's pretty funny, but very fifteen years ago. What, are we going to teach him the Macarena next?
• Milo played in the sprinkler for the first time. He was a little cautious at first, but got into it after awhile. Video to come, maybe, if I get around to it.
  
• My five-year anniversary at Hallmark is in a couple days. Seems hard to believe that I've been at this company that long. Hallmark has so many people who have been here for 25 or 30 years, that to be here for only five is to still be considered new. I spent about a month in proofreading, then spent almost a year and a half in visual merchandising before moving to the books team, where I've been for almost three and a half years. Good times. Sometimes I wonder how many years I'll work at Hallmark. Will I retire from here? I have no idea, but I'm happy where I'm at for now.
• Sometimes I have incredible guilt over being a working mom. Scratch that. I often have incredible guilt over being a working mom. I see things that daycare does that are just not good enough, and I think, if I stayed home, Milo would have better. I don't really want to stay home with him, though. So instead I just cry sometimes and wallow in the guilt.
• Some days I really hate daycare. Some examples: 1) Now that Milo is eating at a table with the other kids, we basically quit sending lunch and snacks with him and just let him eat the daycare food (which is crappy). So we cross off the things on the menu that we don't want him to have, like pop-tarts, brownies, and honeybuns, among others. And then when I pick him up, I see that he was fed pop-tarts anyway. Apparently the teacher that remembers to check our crossed-off menu wasn't here yet. But seriously, why does a daycare feed one-year-olds pop-tarts and brownies IN THE SAME DAY anyway? Outrageous. 2) Milo's classroom plays outside every day. They have some kind of mulch out there, I guess. The other night, after Milo had been home for over an hour (and fussy the whole time) I took his shoes off and TONS OF MULCH FELL OUT. Little pieces of WOOD inside his SHOES, that were sandal-like, so he didn't even have SOCKS on. No wonder he was fussy. I would be too if I had been walking around with shrapnel in my shoes for hours on end. 3) When I got to daycare the other day, I noticed right away that Milo smelled like poo. His teacher asked if I wanted her to change him before we left, since it had been a couple hours since his last diaper change. I said, yes please. And as she cleaned him up, I stood there playing with Milo. And she was about to snap up the clean diaper, but I could still see SEVERAL LARGE PIECES OF MULCH around his groin. I said, would you please wipe those away before putting on the new diaper? She said, oh sure, I can do that. AS IF IT WERE UNREASONABLE TO ASK TO REMOVE THE CHUNKS OF WOOD FROM MY SON'S UNDERPANTS.
• We have a mile-long list of house projects, but it doesn't look like we're going to cross many of those projects off any time soon. Lack of money, lack of time, lack of Mark and Stan (they're tied up with Mark's house project). One of my goals for 2011 was to redecorate our bedroom. I've purchased some new bedding and some accessories, but I'm not sure new furniture is going to happen this year. I have to sell our current furniture first, anyway. If you or anyone you know is looking for an ebony-stained hardwood bedroom furniture set that includes a queen-sized bed, two nightstands, tall dresser, and a wide dresser with big square mirror, let me know. I'd probably be willing to make a deal.
• I just learned at work that my department is moving to a different location in the building. I'm going to miss my cube. I've got a narrow sliver of window (a rare commodity in this place). I'm against the wall so I never have any passersby. And because I'm against the back wall, I'm missing a cube wall, which gives me an extra eight inches or so of space. It'll be a sad day for me when we make the move. I hear it'll be sometime before August, so I'll just have to make the most of our last summer together.
• As you may have (but probably haven't) noticed in my "about me" sidebar, we are now a one-cat family. As you might recall, I had some major concerns about our cat Gary and her aggressive tendencies. Hoping to help her release some of her tension, we let her become an outdoor cat last fall. It went okay for awhile. But we put her outside on December 7, and I haven't seen her since. I remember the exact date, because it began snowing on my birthday, and I thought, I hope Gary's okay. She's been outside for four days now (longer than usual) and I don't know what she'll do in the cold and snow. Then on Christmas night, we left town to go to Colorado, and I worried that even if Gary tried to come back, we wouldn't be home to let her in. And then winter got more wintry, and at some point, I quit looking for her as I drove into the neighborhood. I have no idea what happened to her. Was she picked up by animal control? I don't think so, since she's microchipped and I think they would have contacted us. Did another family take her in and start feeding her? Probably not, since she would have peed on their floors and bitten their heads off. Was she injured, hit by a car, stuck in a tree, frozen in the snow? Makes me sad to think of it. I remember when we first got her, and she was such a tiny wiry kitten. I said to Andrew, I don't know how sad it will be when she's old and sick. She's my first pet, I can't imagine how I'll feel. But she never got to be old or sick. And honestly, I'm not really sad anymore. I look at Milo, and I know that if that cat had hurt him in any way, I would personally have driven her to the vet to never come home without thinking twice about it. So I guess it's all for the best. I just wish I knew what had happened to her.
• Zadie, meanwhile, our one and only cat, has been wonderful around Milo. She lets him pet her and chase her, and even when he threw himself on top of her, she didn't swat him or anything. She's a good cat. I think we'll keep her for awhile.

Buh

Milo's latest word is "buh." Any guesses on what that means? I'll give you a hint: it's a feathered, flying animal that, if early, gets the worm.

He's 14 Months Old

In the last month, Milo has learned a few new words. He says "hi" and "bye" or "byebye." His "hi" makes him sound Southern, like "hiiiyuuuh." He also waves when he says these things. Milo has also learned "Mama." He has said it for a long time, but I never felt like he associated it with me as a name. But now I think he does. He comes over to me, lifts his arms as if he wants to be picked up, and says, "Mama!" So there you have it.

Milo has learned the sign language for "all done" and uses it regularly. It's much better than picking up his plate or throwing his food onto the floor to signal he's done eating.

He bobs along to music and sometimes taps out the beat on his chest or belly.

Milo knows how to go down the stairs. He sits, turns around, and scoots down on his belly. He's really quick, too.

When I say, "May I have that (insert object here), please?" he smiles and hands me the object. When I use this trick to ask for his paci, Andrew is impressed when he just hands it over. I am hoping Milo continues to be so willing as he grows. Occasionally he does not hand over the object, and hesitates, then shakes his head no. But only occasionally.

In the evenings, we have been going for walks. Not with the stroller—Milo walks, too. He follows the sidewalk as far as it will take him. It's pretty fun, just strolling along and letting Milo explore.

Milo is still a good eater. He eats a lot at almost every meal, then his belly just sticks out so round. Andrew calls him "Iron Belly."

Lately, Milo has become fascinated with ceiling fans. He points at them, stares at them, and gets super excited when we turn them on.

Milo is the most easy-going baby in the world. He falls asleep easily, he sleeps through the night, he's playful and fun, he eats well, he's a good cuddler, and he charms everyone he meets.

Milo loves bananas and does a little happy bounce when he knows that someone is peeling one for him.

Milo walks exclusively. I haven't seen him crawl in a long time.

He loves blowing raspberries in the air and using his fingers to make an underwater noise. He is excellent at imitating the sounds we make, like clicking our tongues or popping out our cheeks.

Nana has been taking Milo swimming, and though I haven't seen it, she says that he really likes it and even sticks his face in the water. Crazy.

This week Milo will be officially moved up into the next age classroom at daycare. I'm really sad about this. I know it's probably a good thing. He'll like playing with kids that are a little older. But I just don't know his new teachers, and I don't know what it's going to be like, and Idon'twantmybabytogrowupwaaaaaaahhhhh.

The End of an Era

Milo has officially weaned.

Sometime last week he started to seem less interested in nursing. We'd sit down together, I'd lift my shirt and he'd rest in the crook of my arm, but would only nurse for a moment. I'd try a few times, and he might show a little interest, but after just a few minutes he'd squirm and wiggle down off my lap. After a couple days of this, he refused to even take my breast at all.

Three more days of attempted nursing, and not once did he even have a taste. Then we went to Springfield for an overnight, and it was all over. The night we returned, I didn't even try to get him to nurse. And he didn't miss it.

This evening Milo and I read three books and snuggled and rocked before he went to bed, and even that snuggly closeness didn't tempt him to nurse. So I'm calling it. Stick a fork in us, because we're done.

This is the way I hoped it would end. On Milo's timetable, I mean. But I'm still kind of bummed. Breastfeeding was perhaps the most difficult thing I've ever done, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I should be thrilled that it's over. But I'm sad. My baby doesn't need me anymore.

A Mother's Day Letter

Dear Milo,

This Sunday will be our second Mother’s Day together. Last year you were awfully tiny on Mother’s Day—only seven weeks old. And as it turned out, you pretty much cried the entire day. (Was it because we dressed you in your sweater vest? Sorry about that. But you should know that as your mother, I cannot help myself.) So even with the wonderful breakfast your daddy made for me and the amazing necklace (which I wear very frequently), all that crying you did really put a damper on the day.

This year is going to be a lot different—in ways both good and bad. The good? You are much older, and tend to do less crying. And when you do cry, we can usually fix it with snuggles or food. But the bad—I will not be spending the first two-thirds of the day with you. We are going to a wedding in another town, and you will be spending the night with Grandma Susan and Grandpa Russ. (Remember to wish Grandma a happy mother’s day!)

I can’t tell you how bummed I was when I realized that we’d be driving back to town on Mother’s Day. I was so looking forward to playing with you and spending some fun time together. I thought maybe we’d go to the park or go get frozen yogurt or something. I know you don’t really know that it is a special day, so we will just have to do those things some other time. But I’ll be wishing I was with you.

You are so very special to me. I’m so glad I am your mama. You are more fun than I ever could have imagined. I love your laugh and the way you bounce in your seat. I love tickling your chubby baby thighs and the way you tried to slip me the tongue when I kissed you. I’ve never laughed so hard. I even love the way you take partially chewed-up food out of your mouth and offer it to me. It’s very generous of you.

When you were still growing inside my belly, people would tell me that they couldn’t really describe what it was like to have a kid. You just had to experience it. And, well. They were right. How can you explain the way you love a person who has peed on your face (and his own), vomited in your hair, pooped in your arms, and screamed in your ear? Why do you love a person who breaks your heart when you have to leave him with someone else for a few hours, then turns around and breaks your heart again when you return and he doesn’t want to go to you? There’s simply no explaining it.

Milo, there is nothing you could ever do that would make me love you less. I hope you know that. Thanks for all your hugs and smooches. You’re amazing.

Love,
Mama