Some days I love being home with Milo. Other days I loathe it. Some days the time flies by, and we have so much to do that I wish we had just a bit longer before Daddy gets home. Other days I have no idea how to fill the time, and I end up watching the clock and texting Andrew to see if he's on his way home yet.
Part of me wants to stay home with Milo forever. I'd get to watch him grow and change, and I'd never grow tired of hearing him giggle or seeing him smile at me. But part of me can't wait to get back to work. Not only is my part of my identity tied up in being an editor for Hallmark, but I also grow weary of listening to Milo's cries and of being unable to guess what would make him happy.
I know that when I go back to work I'm going to miss this little boy like crazy. Sometimes my heart feels so full of love for him that it literally aches. I can barely imagine what it will be like to be away from him for nine hours a day. But I think that once I am back at work, I will feel complete. I'll feel more useful than I feel now, like I'm accomplishing something and being productive. I'm not sure how I will end up finding a balance between work and home, but I'm confident it will be the right thing for me.
Only six weeks to go until my maternity leave is over. I'm equally dreading it and looking forward to it.
Friday, August 6
Opposites
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1 comment:
You are accomplishing something and being productive at home. Taking care of your family is one of the most important this anyone can ever do. Milo is going to be better off because he got to spend his first six months of his life with his Mama. Don't let anyone even you diminish how useful you are. I do miss work and hope someday I will get back to it. Enjoy the time you have left at home!
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