Austin: An Essay in Photos

I'm drowning in the cuteness

I am in Pennsylvania visiting Austin. I believe I may have mentioned him? Of course, I can't post any pictures of him right now because I don't have the special little cord that came with the camera. Or maybe I just don't want to share them with you right now. But he is freaking adorable. I'm doing all sorts of caring-for-a-baby things, like snuggling and bathing and diapering and clothing and kissing and thigh-nibbling.

And the cutest part? Andrew whines that he wants a turn holding the baby. And then he never wants to let him go.

Because we’ve reached the limits of our compatibility.

I want to break up with my hair stylist. She just . . . isn’t doing it for me anymore. I talk and talk and try to explain my feelings, but it’s like she’s not even listening. And she used to be so nice, giving me scalp and neck massages and using the nice soft towels. But now? Rush, rush, rush. She leaves me sitting in the chair while she shampoos someone else. Am I not even special to her anymore?

We’ve been together for two years. I think she should know by know which side I part my hair on. Is that too much to ask? I don’t think so. Plus, she never answers the phone when I call and it takes her forever to call me back, if she bothers at all. She just expects me to be free when it is convenient for her. Did she ever consider that I might already have plans?

She used to make me feel so pretty. I’d leave her salon with my head held high, full of confidence. She just made me feel so good! But lately? Lately she’s been treating me like some sort of two-bit whore, with my hair all big and trampy-looking. I just feel so . . . cheap.

But I hate the thought of starting all over again. It’s so hard to find someone new. There are so many things to consider. Will we get along? Will she really understand my needs? Could it be a long-term relationship, or just a fling, leaving me cold and bitter, with an excess of split ends?

And so I stay with her, my anger and contempt growing each time I see her. So tell me . . . how would you break up with your stylist?

Top Fives

Well. Courtney included me on her list of five people whose top five lists she would like to see. And since I’ve never done one of these memes before, I thought I would. Also, I don’t have anything else to write about (except that I have episcleritis, but who wants to hear about that, anyway?). So here you go. Enjoy.

1. 5 things under $5 that I couldn’t live without

• hand lotion (I’m a little OCD about wanting to lotion my hands after washing them.)
• Crest Whitening Plus Scope Cool Peppermint Paste
• mocha lattes
• sunscreen
• a bottle of Modelo Especial when we eat at our favorite (or at least closest) Mexican restaurant

2. 5 favorite movies

• What’s Up Doc?
• Clueless
• Casablanca
• Bringing Up Baby (who knew Courtney and I would have two overlapping movies?)
• Little Miss Sunshine
  

3. 5 baby names I love

• Zoe
• Olivia
• Oliver (but obviously I wouldn't have an Olivia and an Oliver—it’s either/or, people)
• Megan
• Megan (okay, so I ran out of names there at the end)

4. 5 songs I could listen to over and over again

• The Luckiest by Ben Folds
• In My Life by the Beatles
• These Words by Natasha Bedingfield
• Elephant Love Medley from Moulin Rouge (but only when Andrew and I belt it out together)(yeah, we really do that)
• Don’t Ask Me by OK Go

5. 5 people who have influenced me in a positive way

• Andrew (I eat Thai food because of him)
• Amalah (I’m a better writer because of her)
• Ron Clemons (Partly due to his encouragement, I became an editor)
• Emily (She bought me my first beer—okay, fine. it was a wine cooler)
• Lindsay Lohan (I never wear panties anymore)

6. 5 things that are always in my purse

• coffee shop punch cards
• old receipts
• my camera
• Gary, my tiny purse cat
• hott guys’ numbers

7. 5 moments that changed my life forever

• getting my braces off in the 9^th grade
• getting my first love letter
• saying yes when Andrew asked me to go out with him after we had already broken up twice
• accepting a job at Cardoza Publishing
• seeing Ross and Rachel finally get together—true love really does exist!

8. 5 obsessions I have now

• American Idol
• blogging
• Zappos
• finding good outdoor light fixtures
• not getting sunburned/preventing skin cancer

9. 5 places I would like to go

• France (especially Paris)
• Australia (especially Sydney)
• Morocco
• Dubai
• ItalyIrelandEnglandSpainetc.

10. 5 appliances or kitchen tools I cannot live without

• the big, sharp, choppy chop knife
• food processor
• refrigerator
• microwave
• garlic peeler

11. 5 people whose top fives I would like to see

• Emily
• Stephanie
• Christy
• Heather (she clearly doesn’t read this)
• Amy (also doesn’t read this)

Because I can tell you have been dying to know.

A little update on the Cat Genie. Our darling little tiny-brained cats have used it exactly one day. And then they quit, thankyouverymuch. I’m sure glad they appreciate the value of a dollar. The many, many dollars it cost to buy them a fancy new toilet. Also, I hope they like the screeching sound the pipes make whenever the water is running, now that we’ve hooked this thing up to our plumbing system.

Look! Pretty!

In case it isn’t entirely obvious, I have done a little design updating. Isn’t it pretty? If you can’t see it, hit refresh. Or maybe shove the cat off your computer so you can see the screen properly. One of those should work.

I got tired.

Let me tell you a little story about our Friday night adventure. Andrew and I went to the gym and got home around 9:30 (yes, that is really how we spent our Friday evening). I showered and put on my pajamas, figuring we would watch a movie or something then go to sleep, as per our usual. But Andrew says, are you putting on pajamas? Maybe we should go get a beer instead. So I consider this briefly, and even though I didn’t really want to go, decide that maybe I should make more of an effort to be less lame, and put on real clothes instead. I even put on a bra—that is just how dedicated I was.

In the garage, I started to get in Andrew’s car because we would have to fill mine up with gas, and who wants to do that on a Friday night? We have places to be, you know. But he didn’t have his keys with him, so my car it was. And we went to a bar, and I drank some water and Andrew had a couple beers, and good times were had.

Feeling pretty pleased with ourselves for being such night owls, we left the bar around 11:15. I got in the driver’s seat and started to pull out of the parking lot. But something didn’t feel right with the car. It was dragging, and just not feeling normal. I pulled over before we even left the lot to find that sure enough, one of my tires was completely flat. Damn.

Fortunately, Andrew is kind of like MacGyver, so he set about the business of putting on the spare. We nearly froze during this procedure. It wasn’t that cold out (exactly 50 degrees according to the car), but I was just wearing sandals and neither of us had a jacket. And it was windy like Chicago.

And then the tire would not come off. It. Would. Not. Budge. So, feeling more than a little deflated (ha!), we called the 24-hour roadside assistance number. And Toyota got us help. But before the help came, we had some good quality time together sitting in the car. An hour and a half of quality time. And during that time, I reminded Andrew how I wanted to take his car instead.

The tire that refused to budge.

Andrew saving the day with his telephone.

When the help came (30 minutes after the expected arrival time), we had to get out of the car again so it could be rejacked up. And it was even colder than I remembered it being an hour before, except maybe it was windier this time. And the guy tried to pull off the tire, and it still would not budge. And then he dug around a bit in his truck, and pullet out a rubber mallet. A RUBBER MALLET??? This is all we needed to get the tire off? Bang, bang, a couple of swings of the mallet to the back of the tire, and no more stuck tire. And within 5 minutes, the spare was on and we were finally headed home.

Such a pretty spare tire!

And the story does not end there (although the good part does, sorry about the lackluster ending). The next day we took the car in to get the tire fixed. Upon daylight inspection, it looked as though there was a nail stuck in the tire. But the guy at the tire place said that actually, due to wear inside the tire (or something), it could not be fixed, and actually, the treads were really low on three of the four tires, so perhaps we should consider getting new tires. And we looked at the treads, and they were indeed worn down to nothingness. My car doesn’t even have 40,000 miles on it yet, just a mere 37,700. Could it really be time for new tires? But it was. So we replaced all four of the tires and ended up spending about 25 times more than anticipated.

And that is my story. Good times.