Back to the Beginning

I wrote this way back in early June, when I had just found out I was pregnant. You know, to capture the moment and all. Enjoy.

June 9, 2011

Big news: I'm pregnant. I know, I can barely believe it myself. Milo is going to be a big brother before the age of two. I found out five days ago and I'm still a little shocked.

We knew we wanted more than one child, and we knew we wanted them to be fairly close together. But when we started really talking about going off birth control for the second time, I did not feel ready. Being pregnant was very hard for me. I hated being sick all the time, I hated the discomfort and the heartburn and the way it messed with my skin. I hated how much weight I gained and how hard it was to lose it. So I wasn't ready to jump into that for awhile, especially not with a toddler running around.

But then... we talked about how long it took us last time to get pregnant. Over a year. And how it could definitely take that long again. And how even though I would probably never look forward to being pregnant again, I knew I wanted to have another baby. So we decided to go ahead and go off birth control, and just take it slow and see what happened. I figured I had a good six or eight months before we would possibly conceive, so I had time to really get excited about having another baby.

And six weeks later, I went and got myself good and knocked up.

We were flying to Chicago to visit friends, and since I hadn't gotten my period, I wanted to double check to be sure I could drink while we were there. Not for a single second did I actually think I might be pregnant. Not even a little. But bam, I peed on the stick and almost instantly the pregnant sign showed up. I did a double-take, then started freaking out. My heart was pounding out of my chest, and I was so shaky I couldn't stand. Sitting on the floor of the bathroom, I called for Andrew, and I couldn't even say anything. I pointed to the stick, and said "That thing says I'm pregnant." I literally didn't believe it. I started crying, out of total fear and shock. I had no idea how we were going to handle two babies. We really didn't have time to let it all sink in because we had an early flight to catch. It took another couple days (and one more positive pregnancy test) before it all really sunk in. Then yesterday the nausea began, and I fully believed I was pregnant.

I honestly don't know if we're ready for two kids. We're going to be a family of four. I don't know how I'm going to handle all the morning sickness and still play with and take care of Milo. There are a lot of things about this situation that freak me out. But then I look at Milo and see just how amazing he is. And I remember how we got through all the hurdles of those early newborn days. And I look at Andrew and know how much he loves me and Milo.

We're going to be just fine.

It's embarrassing, really.

When I was pregnant with Milo, I absolutely required two breakfasts every day. I'd eat something at home, hope not to vomit it back up, then get to work and eat second breakfast.

With this pregnancy, I apparently need to eat two lunches. First lunch around 11:00, then second around 2:30 or 3:00. I've been bringing snacks and such, but today I actually just bought two lunches in the cafeteria. Definitely got some looks. I hope people assumed I was buying for someone else. They don't need to know that the someone else is about two inches long and resides in my abdomen.

 Yes, that is a plate of cheesy pasta and an entire turkey sandwich. Why do you ask?

12 Weeks

12 weeks. That is the number of weeks pregnant I am.

I'll wait for that to sink in. Take your time.

Are you as surprised as I was when I found out? Doubtful. But it's true. We are going to have another baby. Milo will officially become a big brother on or around February 6.

And I couldn't be happier about it.

Where has the month gone? The 16-Month Stats

This last month has flown by. In some ways, Milo seems exactly the same as he did a month ago, and in other ways, he’s totally different.

He’s learning language like crazy. Almost every day he surprises me with another word he knows. I doubt I can even list them all at this point. A few notable words: Daddy, baby, tree, uh-oh, please (spoken and sign language), car.

He can identify his mouth, nose, head, belly, belly button, feet, toes (okay, feet and toes might be the same in his mind), and we’re working on ears.

On command, Milo will give hugs and kisses (sometimes), raise the roof, hand over his paci (most of the time), and say bye-bye.

Milo is turning into a real toddler. As of late, he cries All. The. Time. Pretty sure he’s learned to manipulate us. He throws tantrums, kicks his feet on the floor and screams. He will let his body go limp or throw his head back or fling his body one way or another when he’s upset. It’s very trying and we don’t really know how to deal with it. We’re trying to ignore the bad behavior and reward the good. I still think doing something like putting him in time-out would be fairly useless at this point. Just don’t think he gets it.

Milo has been waking up at all hours of the night crying. Nothing is ever wrong—not poopy, not soaked through, not sick. He just wants to hang out. We’re working on quitting going in there.

No recent official measurements, but I think Milo is growing taller and maintaining his weight. His belly doesn’t seem quite as round lately.

He still has plenty of chub, though. He’s got delicious round thighs and those cute dimples on the back of his hands. We’ve gotten several comments lately from people saying how big he is.

Unfortunately, Milo is starting to be a little bit pickier of an eater. Some nights he’ll eat everything on his plate; other nights he’ll only eat the carbs and dairy. He’s definitely not a fan of meat. Still like eggs, bananas, and yogurt.

His hair looks more and more red to me, especially in the sun.

He’s taken to dancing whenever there’s music playing. So cute to see him bobbing up and down.

He loves being chased, and is getting pretty good at running away—his balance is much improved, and he can basically run at this point.

When he walks, his arms swing around sort of haphazardly in an adorable way. Must get video of this.

Milo has five teeth.

Milo had his first trip to the beach this month. He enjoyed playing in the sand and came to enjoy the ocean, though it was intimidating at first. Photos to come.

Milo swats away things he doesn’t want. Sippy cups, spoons, a book. Sigh.

Even with all these ridiculous toddler traits, the crying and the tantrums and the swatting, it’s fun to watch this baby turn into a little kid. He’s still fairly awesome in spite of growing up on me.

Sorry for the phone-quality photos. Our camera is still with my parents, who drove it (and a bunch of our other stuff) back from vacation.

Guess what?

Remember how Milo had The Diaper Rash That Would Not Go Away? Well! Turns out he had (has?) an MRSA infection!

That's terrible!

Yes. Well. I suppose I feel like somewhat better of a parent for not being able to fix it. I felt such guilt over The Rash, like maybe we just need to switch soaps or lotions AGAIN or try a new detergent AGAIN or give him more probiotics or try yet another rash cream or ointment or put him on another antibiotic for a yeast infection he didn't have (WHICH IS THE EXACT SORT OF BEHAVIOR THAT LEADS TO MRSA IN THE FIRST PLACE).

But still. How many months did he have this infection without it ever being discovered? My guess is close to six. How much damage could it have done in that time? Plenty. How many other kids at the daycare have it (because yes, I am 99.9 percent certain that he contracted it at daycare)? Who knows?

There's really no telling if Milo still has it. His diaper rash is sometimes better, sometimes worse. But since we haven't done anything to treat MRSA, I'd guess it's still present. Poor kid.

The Latest Hallmark Recordable Storybook

Here's the most recent Recordable Storybook I edited. This one jumped straight to #2 out of all our books (only behind our Disney Cars Recordable Storybook, which has the support of the movie to give it an extra boost), and I predict it'll do well for a long time. Go check it out. Perfect for all the little princesses in your life!

Image from Hallmark.com